Whoops?!

We are the only animals that can peer deeply into our futures—the only animal that can travel mentally through time, preview a variety of futures, and choose the one that will bring us the greatest pleasure and/or the least pain. We can learn from mistakes before we make them. We don't have to actually have gallbladder surgery or lounge around on a beach to know that one of these is better than another. We may do this better than any other animal, but why don't we do it perfectly in relationships. May it be that we humans are rarely as happy or unhappy as we expect to be.

The question is why? Why am I such a stranger to myself? Why do I have this tremendous talent for changing my views of events so that I can feel better about them. Our humans are not immediately delighted when our fiance runs away with another guy, but in fairly short order most of us start to realize that "she was never really right for me" or that "we didn't have that much in common." Are these conclusions wrong simply because they are comforting to us? Does rationalization not necessarily mean self-delusion? Why am I so exceptionally good at discovering rationalizations when it is convenient for me to do so.

My thinking is a remarkable tool that allows me to change my views of the world in order to change my emotional reactions to the world. Once we discover how wrong our fiance/wife/husband was for us, her/his departure is transformed from a trauma to a blessing. Now, you and me know it's not big news that humans are good at this.

What is news for me is that we humans don't know that were are so good at this. It is like we wake up every morning and say, "Today I'm going to fool myself."